Coffee Anyone?

This morning I met a friend for coffee. She is going through a difficult time (it seems like it’s going around) and I wanted to just spend a little time with her to listen. For 20 minutes I listened to her stories, we laughed a little, and cried a lot. She was able to share her feelings, her questions about what was going on, and also share her frustrations; and although I did not have answers for her and I’m very careful about giving out advice, I was there. How long does it take you to enjoy one cup of coffee? By the end of our one cup of coffee, we had deepened our friendship, even if it was deepened only a fragment.

I admit it, I am not that great of a friend. I am a natural introvert (which is why I have a lifetime of journals, literally since I was 8 years old). I know it’s surprising to even some of my closest friends to hear because I am in sales and I have been a performer all my life. I went to a leadership seminar once and took one of those personality tests and I was told that I am an introvert but a forced extrovert…a 5 on a scale from 1 being total introvert to 10 being total extrovert.  Whatever. All I know is that I don’t enjoy talking on the phone that much so I believe texting was actually invented for me. Since I am forced to talk and socialize all day for my job, as an introvert, I actually have to recharge myself at different times of the day, and in order to do that, I have always read, played the piano, or listened to music…no talking…alone. If I don’t get that time in the day I feel stressed.

Relationships though, take time. Talking, face to face, or on the phone. Since cancer, I have learned many things and have chosen to live a little differently. For one thing, I have chosen to invest more into people. We live in an incredibly fast paced society and our communication (as much as I love texting) has become impersonal. People have become less friendly and more protective of themselves. I get it, life is hard, the economy stinks, the stories you hear on the news get worse and worse. One thing I did learn is that in the end, we need each other. When I couldn’t speak, people would sit with me and speak to me, tell me stories of their day and just tell me stuff, I loved it. I love to listen and hear people’s stories because it gives you a glimpse into the experiences that have molded them, it also gives you a glimpse into their heart. I read a quote that said, “Our life is a storybook we write for ourselves; wonderfully illustrated by the people we meet.”(unkown author)

My commitment is to have a cup of coffee at least once a week with a friend, old or new, just to listen or to deepen a relationship. It is my challenge to you. It doesn’t take that long and yet relationship with others is what we yearn for. I may or may not share a story or two, but it could get interesting. Make yourself available, 20 minutes is not that long.

Today’s lipstick is Revlon Coffee Bean (I coudn’t resist). It is a shimmery light brown color which actually looks great on tan skin in the summer. I have worn this lipstick off and on for at least the last 15 years. Revlon lipsticks go on smooth and are moisturizing, I like them. My only problem is that you can’t try them on so I have made too many mistakes to guess which is right for me. Coffee anyone?

Tags: Anna Warner, cancer, cancer survivor, external beam radiation, faith, family, friendship, lipstick, My Lipstick Journey Through Cancer, relationships