Another Birthday

25 Oct

Another birthday, another year older…wiser? Who knows. Every birthday since cancer and the bad news from the original surgery has been a BIG deal to me. When you are told by your physician that your prognosis doesn’t look good and quite possibly have less than a year, every moment counts. Since then, even though the cancer has come back a few times, my prognosis has been great and now here I am almost five years after my first surgery, time passes so quickly. When I walked the survivor lap at Relay for Life last year, the sign that pushed me over the edge and made me cry said, ‘I Love Birthdays.’ It’s true, today was pretty emotional. Today, like every birthday, I thought about everything that had transpired over the year and I also thought about how I have changed since cancer. Cancer has taken away a vocal cord which makes it more difficult to breathe and sing and talk sometimes, but I still can. Cancer has taken away a little bit of confidence in my body and health, but I can still run. Cancer has taken away a little bit of magic from my kids’ lives; the magic that helps them think their mom is invincible (at least while they’re young); remember they were only 5,7, and 10 when this all started. This week I was able to spend some time with a college friend and as I sat with her I realized we had been friends for over 20 years and it was awesome. I miss that. I miss the time I had when I was recovering after each surgery, the times when I couldn’t speak and just listened to people and cultivated relationships. We all wish we had more time right? I actually miss some of my caregivers who were some of my biggest support considering I was seeing them almost every week for 4 years.

What did I get from cancer? A new writing voice and the passion to hear people’s stories and understand where they come from. A stirring deep in my soul that wants to change the world. I value time and peace and every relationship that I have, past, present, and even future. I have released control over to God and now walk around with a heart so open that at times it feels broken. Most of all, I have less fear and more faith. I am overwhelmed and so grateful.

Today a friend asked, “What lipstick does one wear on their birthday?” Today I chose Loreal Color Riche lipstick in Divine Wine which you can get at any drugstore. In my humble opinion, Loreal is one of the better drug store brands in terms of color choices and consistency (I think it’s actually owned by Lancome). I chose this color because it’s an easy berry shade on me with a little bit of a brown undertone and of course the name. Celebrating with a nice glass of wine. Cheers!

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8 Responses to “Another Birthday”

  1. Pat yeakey October 26, 2012 at 1:02 am #

    Happy belated, sweet Anna! Hope the year ahead if filled with God’s very best blessings. XOXOXOX…….Pat

    • Anna October 26, 2012 at 7:16 am #

      Thank you so much Pat!

  2. ls J October 26, 2012 at 1:31 am #

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY

    • Anna October 26, 2012 at 7:17 am #

      Thank you!

  3. Jessica Jagod October 26, 2012 at 8:27 am #

    I loved reading your post! Your blogs have been a great way for me to stay in touch with you:) I am so glad your day was special, definitely a day to reflect. Someday I would to swap stories on life and share in how good our God is!

    • Anna October 26, 2012 at 10:11 am #

      Thanks Jess! We need to get together soon,would love to hear your stories!

  4. blissfulmandi October 29, 2012 at 2:05 pm #

    Reblogged this on blissfulmandi's Blog and commented:
    Anna published her book with my publishing company. Her journey has been an amazing one ! Anna, props to you for being such a strong woman!

    • Anna October 29, 2012 at 4:56 pm #

      Thank you Amanda!

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