Archive | December, 2015

Alternate Ending

31 Dec

 

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Another year has passed and one of the best lessons (or reminders) I learned from 2015 is that there is usually an alternate ending to your story. As humans we all have a certain set of expectations on how our life is supposed to be, how it’s all supposed to turn out, what we deserve out of life, etc.. but most of the time it’s not what you expect and some of the time it’s beyond what you yourself could have imagined. It starts at a young age and is influenced by our personal experiences. I see it and hear it from my kids, what they want for their future, what they expect to happen; like my daughter saying she wants to have only sons because daughters are too hard, and my son saying what age he’ll marry…it’s fun to hear because as a parent I just nod my head and pray for the best knowing that life has lots of twists and turns. We all do it. We create a story, a scene in our head of how our life is supposed to be and many times we are disappointed because life just doesn’t meet our expectations; it could be a job, a marriage, our kids, even friendships. At one point after years of disappointment in one area of my life, I decided to either have very low expectations or to have no expectations of anything or anyone because then I would never be disappointed and anything above zero would be a bonus. I’m not sure that’s the best way to think.

There are two words that are closely tied together, expectation (a strong belief that something will happen), and hope (a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen). They almost sound the same don’t you think? Joyce Meyer says, ‘Hope is favorable and confident expectation; it’s an expectant attitude that something good is going to happen and things will work out, no matter what situation we’re facing.’ The difference between the two words seems minuscule and huge at the same time; what sounds better, ‘I’m expecting a better story,’ or ‘I’m hoping for a better story’? I think I can live without having expectations but there is no way I can live without having hope.me1.5.15

My story isn’t at all what I was expecting but without hope (and the love of family and friends) I don’t think I could stay sane. I didn’t expect cancer or divorce, but I also didn’t expect the awesome twists and turns, the people, the joy, the love, and even the heartache that has met me along the way but alas, always an alternate hope-filled ending. Yes, our stories are rarely what we expect but if we always have hope then we can be confident that God works all things together for good and in His time.‘Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.’~Romans 12:12 

Today I wear YSL Rouge Pur Couture Satin Radiance lipstick in Le Rouge which is a blood red. These lipsticks are pure class, they are moisturizing and go on silky smooth. A little bit of a splurge but hey, every once in a while….I chose this color because it’s red and we’re ringing in a new year. HAPPY NEW YEAR, Cheers!

 

 

See ya! Wait, don’t leave!

12 Dec

meandaj

I think the most difficult time in raising children is the teen years.When they’re young they need you. They eat what you prepare, they do what you tell them (for the most part), they are like sponges constantly learning and they have that childhood joy. Slowly (or rather quickly), they get AJbabesolder, start to get more self-sufficient, start to become more influenced by friends and media, then of course, start to talk back. Why is it that the most difficult time for raising a child happens at the exact time they are about to leave home?

I have an 18 year old senior boy. I specify boy because I think there is a huge difference between raising boys and girls. Anyhow, I am trying to navigate through a multitude of feelings and every day brings something different. There are times I count the days until he leaves for college and AJgoofthere are others when I want to never let him go. He pretends to be fiercely independent but then will ask for something simple or say something which points to the fact that he is still young, a child. I think it’s more difficult with boys because somewhere around the age of 12/13 they start talking with one word answers while girls get more emotional but don’t really stop talking/yelling/whining and still communicating with you. I was told a long time ago that when boys leave home conversations become scarce until they find a wife or serious girlfriend who then becomes the central communicator between mom and son again.

AJ 3.5My son’s been receiving college acceptance letters. When he got his first acceptance letter I was so happy for him but my heart dropped because reality showed itself. He is a young adult. He can vote, check into a hotel, maybe rent a car, he’s had a job for a couple years now, etc. yet in this last year he is home I want to hug him more, have him around me more, and kind of spoil him because it has gone way too fast. My first baby who was born 5 weeks early with giant eyes and the longest eyelashes is going to be my first to go. How can I be joyful and heartbroken at the same time?

And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, “Speak to us of Children.”
And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.~K.Gibran

I know my children are a gift from God and they belong to Him who created them. I am grateful.

Today I wear Bite Beauty Mix and Mingle lipstick in Holly/Tannin. I got one of these for Christmas last year as a gift and they are great. LOTS of color! I chose this because it’s double ended, two different colors for my two different moods; Holly, bright red for joy and Tannin, a deeper red for sadness. I know, I know, millions of parents have been through this, it’ll all be fine. Give your kids extra hugs and make good memories! Cheers!!