Tag Archives: lipgloss

Not Easy

17 Dec

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This past weekend has been extremely emotional. Last Friday I was sitting in a Chicago airport coming home from a work meeting when I heard the news of the Connecticut school shooting which killed 20 young children and 6 adults. I sat there crying along with the other adults hearing and seeing the news for the first time. All eyes were on the television screen and as I looked around I saw people crying, shaking their head, calling home. All I could think of was my family and coming home. It was horrific. Saturday, all teams at my son’s high school from Freshman boys, to JV and Varsity boys and girls played basketball against a rival high school to raise funds for the American Cancer Society. All team members on both teams had a special jersey and the name on the back was the name of someone who lost, is fighting, or has beaten cancer. My son’s jersey said ‘mom’ on the back. I couldn’t be more proud as he made an early and lasting impact on his game which they won by over 30 points. Sunday morning I ran in another 5K with some friends. I have been struggling with my breathing for the last month or so (because of the constant change of weather I think) so I knew the run would be a challenge; I wasn’t wrong. I knew within the first 30 seconds that this race would be the most difficult so far. I reconsidered doing it just the day before as I struggled with my breathing that night, but I went anyway. Why? Because I had breath in my lungs and because I could. I thought about those kids from the shooting, their families, the holidays, the presents waiting for them; I thought about the cancer game and the names on everyone’s jerseys including mine, and I had to run. run3Life is fleeting and you just never know the time or the place. Sunday afternoon my family went to see The Hobbit at the movie theater. As I sat in the crowded theater I had a fleeting thought of a gunman opening fire that I had to quickly dismiss. FAITH OVER FEAR. We cannot live in fear, I refuse!

There has been a call to action in social media to do 26 Random Acts of Kindness for the 26 lives that were cut short last Friday. Why just 26?  This is what I’ve been talking about, this is what my blog is about, this is what I am passionate about. EVERYBODY MATTERS! Why can’t there be an act of kindness daily, hourly, every minute??  We are not hobbits and life is not easy. Everyday we are with people, people with stories, people with heartache, people who we may need ourselves. Make each moment count…love God and love others! Don’t stop reaching out, open yourselves up. We need each other.

Today I wear Philosophy lip gloss in Thank You. It is a sheer raspberry color that only comes in a set. I chose it because Philosophy lipglosses are yummy and this is no exception. I mainly chose it for the name…thank you all for being a part of  my life!

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Open Up

12 Dec

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This past weekend we celebrated Christmas in Indiana with my father in law and my husbands’ two brothers and their families. His youngest brother is engaged to be married next month and I finally had a chance to meet the newest member to join our family. She is great and I’m so excited to have her in the family. This week I am in Chicago for another meeting with my new company and there are even more people to meet as well as others from before that I am able to get to know more. Isn’t that great? I believe that people come in and out of our lives for a reason. Prior to cancer I was more shy and I guess ‘distant’,  keeping people at arms length…you know, the facade stage, nothing deeper. Now, everything has changed and I want to dive in and know people’s stories. In light of that, some of you have read my book and have been reading my blog for a long time and you know mostly about my cancer journey. Today, in an effort to ‘let you in’ and know me better (besides the fact you already know I love lipstick) I thought I’d list some things you didnt know about me:

1. Besides lipstick,  I also love chocolate and all things carbs (bread, crackers, cookies, etc)
2. My first kiss was Shawn Cassidy, the album cover, which I kept under my pillow
3. My first crush was in second grade to a boy named Russell. For Valentines Day he gave me a pretend makeup kit ….was this the start of my lipstick love?
4. I am a total introvert and generally shy, which is why I love acting
5. I don’t enjoy cooking and if I didn’t have kids I believe my husband and I could survive on cereal and toast
6. I have a degree in science which I struggled with after I changed my major from Music
7. Chopin is my favorite classical composer. His music is very emotional
8. Every day from 1st grade through 12th grade I brought a peanut butter sandwich to school (Jiffy peanut butter on Wonder bread)
9. I hate spiders…no, all bugs really
10. I’m allergic to cats, therefore I am a dog person
11. I ran away from home once when I was a teenager but only for a few hours at the mall (sorry mom and dad)
12. My first job was at Burger King. I was 14 1/2 and have not really stopped working since
13. I didn’t enjoy reading books until after college. Cliff notes were my best friend
14. I hate talking on the phone; texting was made for me
15. I’ve kept a journal since I was 9

That’s it for now, just some basics. Do we have anything in common? I’d love to get to know all of you too. Tell me your stories!

Today I am keeping it simple and wearing Burt’s Bees tinted lip balm in Rose. I love it. It’s moisturizing and smooth, all natural, and inexpensive. Rose gives me just a pop of color. I of course have Red Dahlia too which I love. Keep opening yourselves to new people, it softens your heart. Cheers!

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Stained Glass

12 Nov

 

I read this great quote today (thank you to I Had Cancer), ‘People are like stained glass windows-they sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when darkness sets in their beauty is revealed if there is a light from within.’

Last week I was at a meeting getting to know my new co-workers from across the country. Since the company is quite small, it was easy to meet and get to know the other 40 sales reps in the room. Reading the quote above reminded me of the week. We were all ‘stained glass windows’; we all had our ‘good’ clothes on, were on our best behavior, and for the most part, always had a smile on our faces. It was great meeting new people and learning a little about their backgrounds. As I was getting ready to leave my hotel room and meet everyone I realized how far I had come since walking into my first meeting 21 years ago. I was a shy introvert who struggled with a bit of social anxiety. On a personality test at a management meeting, the evaluator said I was a natural introvert, but forced extrovert (maybe that’s why I love acting?). In the past, I was perfectly comfortable with small talk and keeping people (especially those I work with) at a safe distance, but this time was different. I believe God has you where you need to be and I don’t believe you meet people by accident; I believe it now more than ever post cancer. So here I was, an open book, pressing in. It doesn’t take much these days to open someone up, people want to share, they want to be hugged, they want someone who can look them in their eyes, we just don’t do it enough anymore…fear of hurt? Anyhow, the stories I heard from different people, wow. Families hurt by divorce, a mom with cancer, a mother-in-law in her last days, others starting over and afraid of the unfamiliar. It was overwhelming, heartbreaking, and encouraging. On the last day I was speaking to one of my new co-workers (and new friend), and he asked how I found out so much about people. It was simple, I asked then I listened. It’s the same thing I want, someone to ask and listen, truly someone who cares. So what about you? Where has God placed you? Who are in your sphere of influence? We can’t all be Mother Theresa or Billy Graham, but we do have people right in front of us that want to know that they matter. I know because I’m one of them. Reach out, you may be the only one.

Today I wear an old standby Dior Addict Lip Glow. I LOVE this stuff. This is the only product that hits the bottom of the tube and I re-purchase. It is an incredible lip balm that brings out the natural pink ‘glow’ of your lips. I chose it for today because of the quote “…but when darkness sets in, their beauty is revealed if there is a light from within.” Cheers!

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Common Thread

6 Nov

“You may have noticed that the books you really love are bound together by a secret thread. You know very well what is the common quality that makes you love them, though you cannot put it into words…” CS Lewis

I’ve been in a little funk lately, just feeling kind of ‘gray’. I guess it is a normal thing for cancer/former cancer patients to feel when on a downswing wondering which direction life is leading them (I think it’s normal for everyone). Anyhow, over the past few years I have run into many people affected by cancer; cancer survivors/fighters and those that support them. As I thought about the quote by CS Lewis, I believe you can find a common thread in people who you are attracted to, or close friends; but speaking to ‘cancer’ people, there are definitely commonalities. Here are some to think about:

*Fighter.Survivor.Strong.Courageous. All great labels, but sometimes we either don’t want the name (figher/survivor) or don’t feel like we’ve done anything to deserve the name (strong/courageous). We simply did what we had to do and rose to the occasion.

*For those of us who have survived, we wonder what our greater purpose is.

*We don’t stress too much about small stuff or really very much of anything.

*We expect the best from people, honesty, love, no games

*Sometimes we want to just spend the money, we wonder why we’re saving

*We are more fearless and take more risks

*We are more emotional because we have been broken

*We like peace

*We get nervous with every little change in our body, even if its allergies or a cold. We are very aware of EVERY change and wonder if it’s the cancer or a side effect of the treatment

*We realize that while the world around us has generally stayed the same, we are forever changed

*Time is everything and checking items off that bucket list is now a priority

It’s a tough journey and I would have rather not been part of it, but we don’t get to choose. Looking at the list it seems everyone, cancer or not, would have those common threads. Why must a life-changing illness remind is to keep life simple?

Today I wear Bobbi Brown lipstick in Raisin. I love Bobbi lipsticks for both their moisturizing, color, texture…really, they are just great lipsticks.  It’s a medium brown/plum shade that I love. Raisin has been my go-to color for at least 10 years, keeping it simple today. Cheers!

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Another Birthday

25 Oct

Another birthday, another year older…wiser? Who knows. Every birthday since cancer and the bad news from the original surgery has been a BIG deal to me. When you are told by your physician that your prognosis doesn’t look good and quite possibly have less than a year, every moment counts. Since then, even though the cancer has come back a few times, my prognosis has been great and now here I am almost five years after my first surgery, time passes so quickly. When I walked the survivor lap at Relay for Life last year, the sign that pushed me over the edge and made me cry said, ‘I Love Birthdays.’ It’s true, today was pretty emotional. Today, like every birthday, I thought about everything that had transpired over the year and I also thought about how I have changed since cancer. Cancer has taken away a vocal cord which makes it more difficult to breathe and sing and talk sometimes, but I still can. Cancer has taken away a little bit of confidence in my body and health, but I can still run. Cancer has taken away a little bit of magic from my kids’ lives; the magic that helps them think their mom is invincible (at least while they’re young); remember they were only 5,7, and 10 when this all started. This week I was able to spend some time with a college friend and as I sat with her I realized we had been friends for over 20 years and it was awesome. I miss that. I miss the time I had when I was recovering after each surgery, the times when I couldn’t speak and just listened to people and cultivated relationships. We all wish we had more time right? I actually miss some of my caregivers who were some of my biggest support considering I was seeing them almost every week for 4 years.

What did I get from cancer? A new writing voice and the passion to hear people’s stories and understand where they come from. A stirring deep in my soul that wants to change the world. I value time and peace and every relationship that I have, past, present, and even future. I have released control over to God and now walk around with a heart so open that at times it feels broken. Most of all, I have less fear and more faith. I am overwhelmed and so grateful.

Today a friend asked, “What lipstick does one wear on their birthday?” Today I chose Loreal Color Riche lipstick in Divine Wine which you can get at any drugstore. In my humble opinion, Loreal is one of the better drug store brands in terms of color choices and consistency (I think it’s actually owned by Lancome). I chose this color because it’s an easy berry shade on me with a little bit of a brown undertone and of course the name. Celebrating with a nice glass of wine. Cheers!

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Relax

19 Oct

This week was the first official week of my new job and I decided I really don’t like not knowing what I’m doing. I traveled to both Pittsburgh, PA and Columbus, OH to meet with both my trainer and my mentor. I know how to do the actual job because it’s what I’ve done for 20 years, but to learn all of the processes of a new company like computer, expense report, etc…wow, it’s a lot. What I find interesting is that as I get older after being downsized from lay offs or company buy outs, is that the grass is not always greener. After all my experiences though (including cancer), I know better what I’m looking for and what I can tolerate. So far, I really like the decision I’ve made, it’s just funny hearing what people complain about thinking it would be better somewhere else, typically it’s not, it’s just different. I believe there are no accidents and that God opens and shuts doors, sometimes leaving us to wonder…what? why? Oh well, always good to mix things up.

After all the travel and stress of learning the tools of the new job, I decided to get a massage today. I don’t usually get massages because I am crazy ticklish, but I knew I needed it. I carry my tension in my neck and shoulders and because of all the surgeries and radiation to my neck, I have a lot of scar tissue. The scar tissue affects some of the nerves in my neck so when I’m tense, it’s harder for me to breathe and I start losing feeling in my left arm. By Thursday morning, my left arm was numb and I felt like I couldn’t catch my breath so I used some of my early birthday present money from my parents and decided to get a massage. It. was. fantastic. One of the things I loved about it (besides of course the relaxation), is that it forced me to sit still for an hour and relax. It gave me time to focus and think about today, it almost made me cry (I’m such a wuss). My birthday is coming up and as I thought about it laying there, I realized I haven’t had cancer since May of 2010, two and a half years. Yes there have been scares and I’m still on ‘watch’, but surgeries and radiation in 2008, 2009, and 2010…now, here I am, so thankful for my health, my family, friends, my life. So many lessons learned…it’s overwhelming. If not a massage, take a few minutes and think about your life. Sit still, think about the good, the bad, and the ugly but maybe start with ugly and finish with good. If you can’t remember, get yourself a journal or notebook and read through at the end of the month, then thank God for your blessings and for still being around to read what you wrote.

Today I go beyond lipstick and totally recommend Sephora Favorites Super Stars Beauty Essentials Kit. I just got mine yesterday and it is AWESOME! Sephora puts kits together based on their best sellers and they are usually in categories like fragrance, mascara, lips, etc. I don’t typically buy kits because most of the time I know I’ll only be using one or two products and the rest will go to waste. This one is different…every single thing in this particular kit is awesome, not to mention five of the nine items included are their normal FULL SIZE! I LOVE THIS KIT and the colors they chose for lips, eyes, and cheeks are universal and will look great on just about every skin tone! Have fun!!

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Change

7 Oct

This week my oldest son had to have hand surgery. His hand was in an awkward position grabbing the ball at his basketball game and it wasn’t until a couple days later when the swelling came down that we found out there was an actual spiral fracture in his hand. As I sat in the hospital room watching the staff put an IV in his arm and hook him up to the machines to monitor his heart rate and blood pressure prior to the surgery, I decided that I like it much better on the other side. As a parent it is VERY difficult watching your child go through something bad, even if it’s just a small fracture in his hand. A few months ago my youngest had a seizure and had to go through an MRI to rule out a possible brain tumor. Yes, I would rather it have been me. Despite the fact that I have been in the hospital more than I would have liked over the past few years because of cancer, I would gladly take the place of any of my children. Thankfully there was no brain tumor and although my older son is sad he could not finish out this fall basketball season with his team, he will be able to play again. I am constantly reminded how quickly things can change. One minute we’re packing for vacation, the next, my youngest is getting an MRI for a possible brain tumor. One minute my son is having the best game so far this season, the next, his hand is broken and is now out for the rest of the season.

As we approach fall in Michigan the air has dramatically cooled down and the leaves are changing colors. It’s a beautiful season here and probably my most favorite. The evening sky has taken on some beautiful hues of orange and red and the ‘cold’ sky is beautiful as well, sometimes it overwhelms me, God is so good. One thing’s for sure, change is inevitable. The leaves will fall, the plants will die and in the spring, they will bloom again. Life is like that, right? Always changing…a new job, a new baby, illness, etc. We can never get too comfortable but why would we want to? Shouldn’t life be an adventure with both good and bad to shape us? Change allows us to experience and grow in all our emotions but most of all change gives us a chance to test our courage and grow

“And that is how change happens. One gesture. One person. One moment at a time.” -Libba Bray

Today I wear Nars Larger Than Life lip gloss in Viva which is a rose color. Nars is traditionally awesome for lipsticks and lipgloss and this is a newer formulation. These glosses have lots of color and lots of shine. Viva is an easy neutral that I think anyone can wear.These glosses are a little sticky but beautiful. I chose this one for the name..Viva…LIVE!!

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Why Worry?

1 Oct

A few days ago I was talking to a customer whom I haven’t spoken to since June. His son was diagnosed with a brain tumor a few years ago right before my second recurrence and surgery for cancer. Last June he told me his son was doing much better and they thought he was finally in remission. When I asked him the other day how he was doing, he told me his son passed away in July, the cancer took a turn and went into his bones. In one month’s time his four year old was gone. As he told me the story of how he and his wife were comforted by the fact that he was no longer in pain and they were able to hold him in their arms until he finally passed, I sat speechless and breathless with tears in my eyes. When he was finished we were both quiet for awhile and he looked at me and asked, ‘You don’t worry too much about anything anymore do you, not much can stress you out, right?’ Hmmm, I do worry about my kids, but there’s not much anymore that can freak me out. If I’m not running exactly on schedule or if I can only check one thing off my ‘to-do’ list so be it. Every day we have obstacles and opportunities thrown at us and we have to deal with it as it comes. Can it get exhausting? Of course, but then again, even some of the best laid plans fail. I more than ever believe that sometimes God has a plan and sometimes it’s not the same as ours, sometimes you just have to trust it’s the right plan and you move forward. That simple word ‘trust’ is so freeing. The fall sky has been so amazing, it is a reminder that there is someOne much bigger than myself. Here are a couple pictures:

Today I ran a race with my daughter and a close friend going through a difficult time. The three of us ran for different reasons; my daughter ran because well, I think she wanted to prove to her brothers and herself that she is athletic. My friend ran because I promised her we would take it slow and that she would feel great but also because I forced her to  do something for herself. Today I ran because running helps me feel like I have a little control of my body and although it’s super hard to breathe, it stills makes me feel free…hard to explain. Today we ran as Team Lipstick Journey and swiped on red lipstick at the finish line. In the future I would love for the team to grow and possibly start raising funds for cancer charities. Who wants to join the team? One condition, the red lipstick goes on.

Today I wear Make Up Forever Rouge Artist Natural lipstick in N47, brick red. These lipsticks are moisturizing and semi-sheer and this is the one we swiped on after the race! Cheers!

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Free Coffee

25 Sep

The other day I was in the Starbuck’s drive thru. There were a few people in front of me, but I thought I’d wait. When I got to the window I was told that the man in the car in front of me paid for my drink. Believe it or not, tears started welling up in my eyes, thank goodness I had sunglasses on. I had been having one of those days. You know the ones, nothing seems to be going right, it was cold which meant summer was coming to an end, did not get enough sleep the night before, struggling with work, the kids’ schedules seemed too full, allergy attack, whatever else; I was feeling overwhelmed and was looking for something positive to focus on so I turned to Starbuck’s for the Pumpkin Spice Soy Latte both as comfort and as an afternoon pick-me-up .Well, when the kind stranger paid and drove off, unbeknownst to him, he completely changed my day and my outlook.

We always wonder (at least I do) how we can help change a life for the positive, how to make an impact. For me, that day, it was getting a $4.00+ cup of coffee for free, paid for by a total stranger. It is not always the grandiose ‘Oprah starting a school in Africa’ thing or the ‘sell everything you have and give it to charity’ thing. No, sometimes it’s as small as a smile or a compliment, or even a cup of coffee that could change someone’s moment, day, and life. How crazy is that? I immediately wanted to pay it forward, pay for the next person’s drink, but no one was behind me in the drive thru.

How do we change the world? It may just take that one moment, or be that one small act of kindness.  Show people you care and that they matter, take them by surprise!

Today I wear an old standard for me, Revlon lipstick in Coffee Bean. This is a great shimmery brown with a little bit of a plum undertone. This is a great every day color for most skin tones although it does have a little shimmer. Obviously today I chose it for the name in honor of that cup of coffee. Cheers!

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It Is What It Is

5 Sep

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I hate that phrase by the way, ‘it is what it is’. My arm hairs bristle every time someone says it. I think because I view it as a cop out, or an excuse, like things can’t change or be changed. I guess sometimes that’s true.

I had my doctor appointment last Friday to finally discuss the ultrasound and MRI findings from a few weeks ago. If you recall, he was on vacation immediately after my ultrasound so I haven’t spoken to him about the results and possible next steps. Well…here’s how it went….Doc: I think you’re good for now, see you in a few months. Me: What about the growth the radiologist saw? Doc: Well, you can do a PET scan but it will say the same thing, abnormal tissue, it’s up to you. Me: What do you think I should do? Doc: Check if it’s grown in 3-6 months…if it has,it’s probably cancer, if not, it’s probably just scar tissue. Besides, no surgeon is going to want to go back in there right now. Me: It’s been 2 and a half years since surgery and radiation, when does scar tissue stop growing. Doc: Now. Just live life as normal and I’ll see you in a few months.

That’s it. Life goes on. Isn’t that true though about anything? Illness, you get fired or laid off from a job, your child leaves for college, you miss an appointment….life ALWAYS moves forward. How do we handle that? There’s only two choices, positively or negatively. I have to choose positive, even if I’m kicking and screaming, because I trust God has a plan. It may not be the same plan I’m thinking, but His wheels are in motion and I’m there for the ride.

Today I wear Bite Beauty Honey Lip Lacquer in Aurora which is of course, red. These are interesting, I saw them on display at Sephora last weekend and had to try. They are all natural and long lasting, actually made from 100% honey. These are high shine glosses and for me, a little sticky but beautiful nonetheless. I chose red because, well, it’s a bold color always reminding me to live out loud with no fear. By the way, I’m done being angry…it gets tiring after awhile (remember my last blog called ‘Tired?’). So here I am, living the dream (another phrase I hate). Cheers!

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