Tag Archives: motherhood

Advice Mom Gave

6 May

Three Generations

Three Generations


Mother’s Day is coming soon so I thought I’d write some of the best advice my mom gave me. First I need to tell you a little about my mom. She is one of the strongest women I know. She lost her dad suddenly when she was 16 which forced her mom (my grandma) to go back to work. Since her older sisters were working/married/semi-out of the house, she was the main caregiver for her brother who had muscular dystrophy and was wheelchair bound. Despite the challenges of helping take care of the home and her brother she went to college and graduated salutatorian of the university. Years later she met my dad, got married, and jointly they decided to move to America for a better life for their children. They chose Michigan, with no other family and not really knowing anyone. She immedately got a job as a social worker and worked over 30 years until her retirement. We always had what we needed and we always knew we were loved. Here was some of her advice to me growing up:
* Never give up, work hard for the things you want
* Don’t forget to take care of yourself too
* Be kind to everyone, treat others the way you want to be treated
* Always be thankful and write thank you notes
* Never leave the house without a little blush (no makeup before 16 years old of course)
* Be self sufficient, don’t expect hand outs
* Always be early, it’s disrespectful to be late
* You never know until you try
* At the end of the day thank God for all your blessings

My mom did the best she could with what she had. I have vague recollection of the day she started her new job as a social worker in a city let alone country she was unfamiliar with, and she had to leave me at a Detroit child care. I can see her standing at the door crying while I stood crying, I must’ve been 3 or 4 years old. I remember her crying too when she and my dad dropped me off for the first time at my college dorm. More recently I remember the look on her face when I told her I had cancer the first, second, and third time…none of those times got any easier. I think of my kids and how I would react to that news and it breaks my heart. Was my childhood perfect, was she the ‘June Cleaver’ of all moms? Of course not (does that even exist?). Am I the perfect mom? Far from it, we are all imperfect and every child is different but I do my best. I grew up seeing a smart woman of strength and character who supported my every move from youth to even now and I never doubted her love. Motherhood is the hardest job on earth and I question how I’m doing at it on a daily basis. I give some of the same advice my mom gave me and I pray really hard. Thank you mom for a great example of motherhood, for all the sacrifices you made, and for me never having to doubt your support. Happy Mother’s Day! “Mothers observe all, absorb all, give all, forgive all, offer all, suffer all, feel all, heal all, hope for all, pray for all.
But most of all,Mothers love always.” ― Richelle E. Goodrich

Today I wear Tarte Lipsurgence in Grateful which is a pinky brown or as they describe it ‘rosy nude’. I’m a little mixed with these ‘moisturizing’ stains. They do have nice color and they do last but because my lips are on the drier side I add a gloss which then decreases their staying power. Also, they say it adds or locks in moisture but again, since it’s a stain, it’s still a little dry for me. Nonetheless, they’re all natural and have nice colors. I chose grateful for both the name and the color which is easily ‘wear-able’ as an every day pinky/nude. Cheers!

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Make a Friend

3 May

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I just watched a video on YouTube called ‘Take a seat, make a friend‘. Essentially the makers of the video set up one of those enclosed spaces filled with balls that kids jump into at places like Chuck E Cheese or at play areas, you know what I’m talking about? Anyhow, buried in the ‘tank’ are questions, two strangers climb in, pull out questions and ask them to each other. A couple things were interesting, first, people actually stopped in the middle of the street to get in the tank, and second, by the end of the questions they mostly had found something in common and were hugging good-bye. I’ve been traveling a bit lately for vacation and work. I’m the person on the plane that sits down and looks down, not really wanting to talk to anyone, just get me to my destination. Rude I know, I’ve even pretended to read or fall asleep. To be honest I feel a little claustrophobic and I also get a little queasy on a plane so I’m already at a disadvantage. A little over a month ago I flew to New Orleans to do a cancer talk and for the first time in a long time engaged in conversation with the people I sat in the middle of (not because of me really, I was still looking down). The conversation was great, the stories were awesome, and I left there feeling like I met new friends (I still keep in contact with one of them on occasion). This past week I was on an airplane again for work and when I sat in my seat I decided at the very least to introduce myself to the person next to me. I said hello and asked why she was headed in the same direction. She tells me her name, says she studies people and human behavior (which piqued my interest), then says, ‘I have a lot of work to do,’ turns pulls out a notebook and buries her face in her book. WHAT??? Made me laugh. She says she researches people but doesn’t want to talk. Oh well, I tried, I thought the interaction was funny. Here’s what I learned from the video, people still like face to face interaction, and if given the time, most of us can find something in common. It’s still great to look someone in the eyes, shake their hands, hug them. We do a lot of communicating on line, email, text, and I LOVE it, but we’re starting to miss out a little on the souls we get to see in each other’s eyes…that human touch and interaction. Don’t forget, we need each other, live and in person too.
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”~Leo Buscaglia

Today I wear Tarte Amazonian Butter Lipstick in Poppy. These are like the name, buttery. Feels a little heavier than lip balm and super moisturizing. Tarte lipsticks are all natural and these are made with Amazonian butter (which somehow sounds better than Detroit butter?). They are also in a cute floral lipstick tube. The colors don’t last quite as long but that’s what happens sometimes when you choose something more buttery. It says that Poppy is a warm red but on me shows up a little brighter but perfect for spring/summer…which I know will eventually happen here in Michigan. I chose it specifically for the color because I’m so ready for warmer weather! Cheers!

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Truth

24 Apr

clearwater14
I know it’s been awhile since my last post but you know when your life feels like it’s in overdrive? After our short vacation I’ve felt super busy; partly from the need to do spring cleaning of my house, partly work, and partly the kids’ activities, just not enough time in the day to accomplish all I want to do. Oh yeah, we have to include sleep in there too! This past week I got to sing again at what has become one my most favorite events, my local World Voice Day Celebration. This event put together by my physician showcases different styles of singing from performers who have had some type of vocal injury as well as physicians and healthcare providers that help us regain and recover our voices. This event is particularly special to me primarily because I used to be a singer and I thought I had lost my ability to sing when cancer and the first surgery took my nerve and therefore took my right vocal cord along with it. Being at Voice Day and singing (albeit different and weaker) represents to me the big picture miracle of still having my voice after cancer three times leaving me with one functioning vocal fold. It also serves as a reminder of my cancer journey and how far I’ve come. I’m always so grateful and emotional and this year was no different. You can see my performance with an intro by my doc here: http://youtu.be/UcmQjzNC3SM

My last blog post (Just Rambling) on relationships was one of my most read posts of all time telling me people love authenticity and truth. I wrote it off the cuff (hence the title) and direct from my heart. Sometimes truth is met with criticism because sometimes people only want to hear the ‘warm and fuzzy.’ Sometimes truth is a mirror to something they don’t want to hear about themselves or just plain blinding light in the darkness. Whatever it may be, life is not warm and fuzzy all the time. I write as an extension of myself and I will not trade authenticity for safety.It’s sidenot always pretty but to censor what I write to make people feel better or more at ease would be to censor my feelings and say it’s not alright to feel that way. Life is not always a fairytale and cancer is definitely not a party, but I will always look for the positive and stay authentic because that’s who I am and that’s really what this blog is all about. This is my heart, thanks for sticking around. ‘When you tear out a man’s tongue, you are not proving him a liar, you’re only telling the world that you fear what he might say.’~George R.R. Martin

Today I wear Smashbox Be Legendary lipstick in Legendary which is a true red. This particular lip color in the Be Legendary line is moisturizing, some of the other colors are more matte. I chose this color because I’m in a ‘red’ mood, loving life and loving the fact that spring is here and new life is springing all around; and who doesn’t want to be legendary? Cheers!

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Just Rambling

16 Apr

2014-04-10 08.45.07
Sometimes relationships end not because you want to but because you have to. Sometimes it’s opening your eyes to the reality that the story you had longed for had not only turned a different direction but was never really the story to begin with. We all enter relationships in different times of our lives; I’m talking friendships all the way to marriage. We come into things based on the information we have about the other person and what we think we know about ourselves, our needs, and our expectations. What if the information we thought about the other person was way off and over time the rose colored glasses became clearer and clearer? What if it’s because we ourselves become different people; stronger and braver because we now have a voice and self worth along with it? What if you pour your entire soul and being into someone only to realize it didn’t matter because that person would not be different, that they would just expect more? Here’s what happens in that scenario, your soul dies a little, you become numb, and when you can’t possibly give more, do more, be more, you’re done and spent. It is not about forgiveness, it’s about exhaustion from expecting something that couldn’t be. What counts more, words or actions? Words can kill, but actions speak a thousand words, therefore, you can die a thousand deaths just from one terrible action right? A lot of talk and apologies lead nowhere when actions are at the opposing end. Regrets? Never. Everything and everyone has it’s purpose in our lives during different seasons to make us better, wiser, stronger, or even to help the other person. I love people and I love their stories but sometimes they have stories I would rather not be a part of. Frank Herbert says, ‘There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story.’ Here’s the beautiful thing about life…it moves on. Every day and every moment is your chance to write a new page. Every relationship is a chance to learn more about yourself, whether that person is in your life for an hour or for years doesn’t matter because every interaction leaves an impact of some sort. One thing I learned, be the person you see in the mirror, your bad-ass self (sorry, had to use that word again). God created you unique and special, believe it.

Today it’s Dior Addict Gloss in Princess. I love all Dior lips products because the colors are beautiful and all of the lipsticks and glosses are quite moisturizing. I chose Princess because it’s a pretty sheer carnation pink that’s easy to wear and also for the name. It’s good to remind yourself every now and then that you’re a princess of the One who created you, now put that crown on! Cheers!

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Write

14 Apr

2014-04-10 08.43.57
Well hello again! I know it’s been awhile but I was on a much needed vacation away with my kids. It was one of the most relaxing and enjoyable vacations we’ve had in a while, the kids didn’t even argue with one another (which is a feat in and of itself with teen siblings cramped into one room and seeing each other 24/7). Everyday, great weather, beachfront hotel, and no agenda. If I could do that for the rest of my life I would probably die smiling, but alas, most (including myself) do not have that luxury. Clearly someone has to pay the bills. Anyhow, I just got back last night so I am a bit brain-dead at the moment so for now you will have to read my disconnected ramblings. Why is it that coming home from a vacation warrants another vacation? I’m tired today and for the last 5 days, I’ve done nothing! Why do shells on keychains and conch night lights look so amazing when sold on a boardwalk on the beach making you feel like you have to have one? Why does a hotel that owns their part of the beach charge for chairs and umbrellas then taxes you for them? Just sayin’…shouldn’t it be first come, first serve? Why can’t I sleep in (still up at 6am on vacation)? Why is snow in the forecast tomorrow in the middle of April when it’s 70 degrees today? It’s all craziness.

Last weekend I went through my collection of cards and letters. I generally keep everything that’s been hand written to me. I read every card sent or given to me through my cancer journey;I read encouraging notes and thank you cards I’ve received over the past 25 years. I also found birthday cards and mother’s day cards hand made by my kids. One in particular made me burst into tears. It was from my youngest Alex. I first got cancer Alexletterwhen Alex started kindergarten and it was his Mom’s Day card which said a couple things. First, “If I could buy my mom anything for Mother’s Day I would buy her a get well present,” and second, “If I could wave a magic wand and make some nice things come true for my mother my wish would be to heal her neck

Notice the scar on my neck?

Notice the scar on my neck?

and make her talk.” There is power in the written word. Don’t get me wrong, I love social media, but we have lost the art of written communication. I happened upon a cause called ‘The world needs more love letters.’ It’s not about being Shakespeare, Yeats, or Browning. It is about being encouraging and loving to those who need to hear it (so…everyone basically). This organization (moreloveletters.com) leaves letters both randomly and not so random, but their mission is simple, to lift, empower, and mobilize individuals through tangible acts of love…a written letter. I know that after reading notes from my kids as well as all the encouraging notes from people through the years who I’ve met, who have heard me sing, or through my cancer journey, I felt supported and uplifted. It’s so simple to write a note and so awesome to receive one. When’s the last time you got a card or an encouraging note in the mail by surprise? Awesome isn’t it? Let’s start writing again, I know I have. Every week I’ll be writing a least one ‘love note’ to someone…if I know your address watch out! If I don’t have your address and you need encouraging words, let me know (lipstickjourney@att.net). The point though is to hand write something for someone else. Ever since they were born, I have hand written a letter to each of my kids on their birthday. I tell them what they’re like and what I’m most proud and amazed about. They are sealed so I can’t ‘edit’, but I can’t wait to give those to my kids on each of their 18th birthdays. Letters are among the most significant memorial a person can leave behind them~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
A letter is a blessing, a great and all-too-rare privilege that can turn a private moment into an exalted experience~Alexandra Stoddard

Write more letters!

Today I wear straight up Aquaphor. This stuff is great because you can use it on your hands, elbows, feet, and your face. I kind of burned my face and lips a little on vacation so this heavier version of Vaseline will be it for me this week! Cheers!

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Flawed

4 Apr

zit (2)
I have a zit, a pimple, a clogged pore…right in between my eyes. You know when you look left or right, when something is in your peripheral vision? Yup, it’s right there, can you see it in the picture? I used to break out as a teen, then when I was pregnant, but it’s been awhile. Even my kids said, ‘Whoa, what is that?’ when they saw me. This week I met up with a friend who I literally haven’t spoken to for almost 30 years. We knew each other as kids and practically grew up together but after high school our paths rarely crossed again…until now. Tons of time had passed but we did not miss a beat, just threw all of our past and current struggles out on the table and wondered why it took so long to reconnect. Life usually gets in the way I guess but again, people come in and out of our lives at exactly the right time; whether it’s because we need them, they need us, or we need each other.

Here’s what I learned (because there’s always a lesson), no matter how we look, what we do, whatever life circumstances we may be in, we all generally want the same exact thing…to be loved and validated. I found it interesting to be looking and listening to a beautiful friend and great mom who was on a very different path then me over the past 20+ years and even now, yet the struggles at the core are still the same. The same holds true for others too; to be loved and validated, it’s that search for significance. Listening to her I realized we had been looking for the same thing but in different ways, for her it was in the ‘doing’, doing for others above and beyond to get that acceptance or even maybe being physically fit so people would accept the external. For me, it’s making sure others are happy around me, being positive, being that people-pleaser sometimes at my own expense, giving up what I truly want to make sure the other person is ‘pleased’, and to some extent ‘doing’ also. One of the many lessons I learned through cancer and life is that sometimes, no, most of the time, that is never enough. The same people you try to please or go above and beyond to ‘do’ for are the ones that will turn on you the next day. So here’s the deal, be yourself, love yourself, and get your validation from God because He made you exactly how you were supposed to be. If we seek significance, love, and validation from other people we will always be disappointed, I don’t waste my time too much anymore because I know life is fleeting.

So back to my zit. My friend said something to me that kind of astounded me. She said she has seen me from afar and has been reading my blog for quite some time. She said that she always thought I was perfect; perfect person, perfect life, perfect family, etc. No, no , NO!!! No one is perfect! We all have junk and most of it lies inside of us. We are all flawed whether it’s external like the pimple smack dab in the middle of my face for all to see, or the soul that constantly struggles on the inside that no one sees. Thank God we are all flawed, can you imagine? We are all less than perfect which is why our love, validation, and significance need to come from God. He knows us, He made us, and He already loves us no matter what. I’m constantly blown away by all the people I meet and talk to, the stories are sad, exciting, hopeful…’We become not a melting pot but a beautiful mosaic. Different people, different beliefs, different yearnings, different hopes, different dreams.’~Jimmy Carter

Today I wear my old standby Dior Lip Glow with Dior Lip Polish on top. LOVE the lip glow, it’s like a balm that brings out the natural pink in your lips. The Lip polish is like a gloss but it actually fills in the lines and plumps your lips a little. The two together are simply awesome! Cheers!

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Let It GO

30 Mar

2012
There’s a super popular song out there from a movie that surprisingly is being played on every radio station, from soft rock/pop to R&B, maybe you’ve heard of it, Let It Go from the animated film Frozen. All of my kids (even the 16 year old boy) know all of the words, we bought the movie and I believe we’ve all watched it at least 5 times (we’ve owned it for two days). Even I now, know all the words to all the songs. So what makes this particular tune so popular? Is it the catchy tune or the lyrics? For me, the more I listen to the actual lyrics, the more brilliant I think they are because we can all relate.
Don’t let them in, don’t let them see, Be the good girl you always have to be. Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know. Well, now they know…
This is me, people pleaser, smile on my face, conceal, don’t let them know. It’s that facade I always talk about. It’s so much easier to smile and say everything’s fine than to put yourself out there. There’s also that element of fear that maybe the real you is not good enough, or interesting enough. The last line, ‘well now they know’, that’s me now. Post cancer the facade is tiring and frankly if you don’t like the real me there are plenty of other people in this world to hang with. Personally, I fall in love (I’m not talking romantic love) with people who show me who they really are, who show me a piece of their soul and brokenness, because we all have some brokenness in us.
Let it go, let it go, Can’t hold it back anymore. Let it go, let it go, Turn away and slam the door. I don’t care, What they’re going to say. Let the storm rage on,The cold never bothered me anyway.
Yes, the storm of life rages on constantly. People talk, people judge, I’m letting it go, turning away from fear and slamming the door. This past week I had a bout of paralyzing fear about a situation I’m currently in. With prayer and a few deep breaths I had to let it go because God is in control. Fear gives power to the thing or person that you are fearful of and I refuse to give any more power to that. It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small, And the fears that once controlled me, Can’t get to me at all…Amen!
It’s time to see what I can do,To test the limits and break through. Let it go, let it go, And I’ll rise like the break of dawn. Let it go, let it go, That perfect girl is gone
How empowering to not have to be or try to be that perfect girl. It is time to see what I can do and test those limits. For me at exactly this time, I am letting go of who I tried to be or was told to be for other people and rediscovering my dreams and who I am, old and new. Letting go is really realizing that certain things are part of the past but not part of your destination. I’m thankful for every single moment because those moments, people, events are what shaped me and who I am today; strong, courageous, and hopeful. The song is brilliant.

Today I’m wearing Revlon Colorburst Lip Butter in Wild Watermelon. You all should know by now I’m obsessed with these because they are so moisturizing and have great color. My fall/winter go to shade is Red Velvet but I now have this color. I LOVE IT! It’s perfect for spring/summer because it is that bright poppy orange/red but doesn’t make your lips scream ‘I’M HERE!!’ You can find these at any drugstore too and they are fairly inexpensive. Let it go! Until next time, CHEERS!

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Friends

22 Mar

AW3.22
So here’s a weird fact about me, I’m the girl who always used to say I didn’t have any close girlfriends. That’s right. When I was young not only was I a shy introvert, but I was also not very much of a girly-girl. I didn’t really play with dolls except to cut their hair and draw on their faces. I didn’t have any Barbies. No, I liked to play in the parking lot, jumping the parking blocks, I had a baseball glove and liked to play anncatch with my dad, I liked to play in the mud and build forts with the boys then throw rocks at each other. I think it was because there was no drama involved, just play, and for an introvert, that was easy. My best friend in high school was a boy (who, much to my my ex-husband’s dismay, was part of my wedding party). Some of my closest friends in college and work have been boys. I think the struggle with me and women has always been the time involved along with the drama. I’ve never really been one to want to talk on the phone very much and if you have a teenage daughter like me, you also know that we females can be mean to each other. Add to that growing up an introvert along with some insecurities, making female friends was alot harder than making male friends. photo

franFast forward to becoming a mom, having cancer, going through a divorce. None of those things are/were easy and had I not had the love and support of awesome female friends (along with my faith), I may not have been as strong. People comment all the time about my courage and strength, but truly like the Bible story of Moses, Aaron, and Hur, when I could no longer hold my arms up, I have/had friends on either side holding my arms up for me. We are all stronger if we can rely on each other. jenAnother thing about female friends, they really listen and have a depth of understanding and empathy (usually). I am happy to say I have many close girlfriends who are true blessings in my life, thank you chicas!’Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.’~C. S. Lewis

stacieToday I wear Sephora+Pantone Universe Radiant Rush Matte lipstick. This is a limited edition lipstick with Pantone’s color of the year, orchid (pinkish/purple). Now, it is matte but it is surprisingly not too dry. It’s a gorgeous color that looks pretty great on everyone and is perfect for spring! I chose it because we are all a little more radiant when surrounded by good friends! Cheers!

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Passion vs Paycheck?

18 Mar

2013-07-03 04.44.07
There was an article I read years ago right around the time the Detroit economy took a dive. It basically shot out a statistic that 80% of Americans actually hate their jobs. The question at the end was ‘Do you pick passion over paycheck?’ The article added that without passion, people will be choosing between the lesser of two stresses: stress from being unemployed versus the stress of being in a dead-end job.

Lately I’ve met a few people who are doing things they absolutely love…and getting paid for it. They may or may not be the most lucrative careers but I see the joy and passion in their eyes of doing what they love. There’s my neighbor/hair phenom with her own salon, the make-up artist who views every face as an empty and beautiful canvas, the artist I met last week, the lawyer turned IT genius and loving it; people all around me doing things they love or switching careers to pursue passion. Every interaction I have with one of these people leaves me wondering about myself and what I’ve done to pursue the things I’m most passionate about. We all wonder if we’re doing what we we’re created to do, if we’re living our purpose, or just staying safe. I think there has to be a balance of course, you can be passionate but not gifted (think American Idol, X-factor, etc. they all think they’re great). I’ve been in sales my whole career life, am I passionate about it? No. Do I enjoy it? Sure. I look at it this way, everyday is a chance to talk to a bunch of people I otherwise may never meet, attitude goes a long way. As life continues to press on with all the stressors attached we tend to push our passions aside and maybe even forget what it is that makes our hearts beat faster. For me, it was always music, singing and dance. My heart still beats fast when I hear a great tune, I sometimes see choreography in my head too. I know I was good at one time but cancer has taken part of my voice and age has made me a little less flexible; passion for music will never go away for me. I do believe though that as we ‘do’ life new passions can arise. I now have new passions for being the best mom, for people’s stories, for writing, and of course, for finding or even creating the perfect lipstick! Billy Graham said,’The greatest surprise of my life is the brevity of life.’ So very true, we have one life and it is oh so short. So do we just quit our jobs and pursue our passions? It depends, we have responsibilities mixed in too, but I think we can do a bit of both, living in the now of what we have. And yeah, I still want to be a rockstar, who doesn’t?

Pretending to be a Rockstar

Pretending to be a Rockstar


‘Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.’~ Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Today I wear Giorgio Armani Rouge Ecstasy Lipstick in 301-Gio. These lipsticks are pretty close to perfect. Longer lasting, great color, and moisturizing. Clearly I didn’t choose the color for it’s name (hate when there’s not a fun name attached to a lipstick), but this color is FUN! Kind of a coral-ly/red…perfect pop of color for summer,ok,spring. LIVE EVERYTHING! Cheers!

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Finding Anna

7 Mar

2013-07-05 16.21.59
Do you ever feel like you’re living in a box…maybe I should say, a portrait? You all know that in general, I’ve spent most of my life as a people pleaser. This is not a bad thing, not at all. Putting others needs before yours? But what happens when you strive to please so much that you start losing yourself? Maybe even forgetting your needs, hopes, dreams? You start living in a box of what you think others want from you but forget about yourself. The past several years with cancer were intense but my focus was on the fight. Lots of things happen in the mind of a cancer patient. Am I going to die? Have I done anything of any significance? Will my kids be ok? In my case, will I be able to speak again, or breathe on my own? Then, if I survive, what things will I change? It has been almost four years now that I’ve technically been cancer free with a few scares along the way and I’ve said before that there are several things I can no longer tolerate; I have a hard time with rudeness, arrogance, judgement, rage, control, entitlement, and massive complaining about things we can’t change. Our time is too short here to waste our breath and energy, and that stuff adds undue stress, I just want peace.

For the past several months, maybe even a year, I have been able to reconnect with many friends from my past. A couple from high school, a couple from college, and a few from my life post college/starting a career era. It has been awesome. During this turbulent time, these ladies have been here to laugh and cry with me, but most of all, help me remember myself; what I loved, what I laughed about, my dreams, and oh…the memories and stories. I don’t believe in coincidence that much. I believe every meeting has a purpose and the timing is always right. Here is what I’ve learned, being a people pleaser is part of my personality, I like making people happy and feel loved and respected, but I can’t forget about me. I used to base decisions on what the other person wanted. Now, I think a little selfishness is ok. I also learned that although I may be on the sensitive side, I am mentally tough, strong, and as one friend put it..a bad ass chick (sorry for the profanity but I liked the description). Because of life experiences, we can never fully be who we once were, but it’s great to come back to your core, remember who you were and incorporate that into who you are now and who you want to be…and yes…I think I might be pretty bad ass.photo(6)

‘To the people who love you, you are beautiful already. This is not because they’re blind to your shortcomings but because they so clearly see your soul. Your shortcomings then dim by comparison. The people who care about you are willing to let you be imperfect and beautiful, too.’~V. Moran

Today I wear Urban Decay Revolution lipstick in F-bomb. These lipsticks are great in terms of having lots of color AND feeling buttery soft (which is usually a hard combo to find). I chose this color because it is a classic red and also for the name…just getting all the profanity out of the way. Cheers!

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