Tag Archives: smashbox

Truth

24 Apr

clearwater14
I know it’s been awhile since my last post but you know when your life feels like it’s in overdrive? After our short vacation I’ve felt super busy; partly from the need to do spring cleaning of my house, partly work, and partly the kids’ activities, just not enough time in the day to accomplish all I want to do. Oh yeah, we have to include sleep in there too! This past week I got to sing again at what has become one my most favorite events, my local World Voice Day Celebration. This event put together by my physician showcases different styles of singing from performers who have had some type of vocal injury as well as physicians and healthcare providers that help us regain and recover our voices. This event is particularly special to me primarily because I used to be a singer and I thought I had lost my ability to sing when cancer and the first surgery took my nerve and therefore took my right vocal cord along with it. Being at Voice Day and singing (albeit different and weaker) represents to me the big picture miracle of still having my voice after cancer three times leaving me with one functioning vocal fold. It also serves as a reminder of my cancer journey and how far I’ve come. I’m always so grateful and emotional and this year was no different. You can see my performance with an intro by my doc here: http://youtu.be/UcmQjzNC3SM

My last blog post (Just Rambling) on relationships was one of my most read posts of all time telling me people love authenticity and truth. I wrote it off the cuff (hence the title) and direct from my heart. Sometimes truth is met with criticism because sometimes people only want to hear the ‘warm and fuzzy.’ Sometimes truth is a mirror to something they don’t want to hear about themselves or just plain blinding light in the darkness. Whatever it may be, life is not warm and fuzzy all the time. I write as an extension of myself and I will not trade authenticity for safety.It’s sidenot always pretty but to censor what I write to make people feel better or more at ease would be to censor my feelings and say it’s not alright to feel that way. Life is not always a fairytale and cancer is definitely not a party, but I will always look for the positive and stay authentic because that’s who I am and that’s really what this blog is all about. This is my heart, thanks for sticking around. ‘When you tear out a man’s tongue, you are not proving him a liar, you’re only telling the world that you fear what he might say.’~George R.R. Martin

Today I wear Smashbox Be Legendary lipstick in Legendary which is a true red. This particular lip color in the Be Legendary line is moisturizing, some of the other colors are more matte. I chose this color because I’m in a ‘red’ mood, loving life and loving the fact that spring is here and new life is springing all around; and who doesn’t want to be legendary? Cheers!

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Lipstick List

22 Mar

For today I thought I’d depart from my usual ‘life’ topics and talk solely about lipstick. For the men who read my blog, sorry, you may exit now, unless of course you like lipstick.  To go along with this weeks topic of my wonderful blogging group GBE2, I thought I’d write a list of some of my favorites, not only lipstick, but cosmetics in general because I love other products as well (although not as much as lipstick).

I hope the picture above does not scare you, but that is my current lipstick selection from my bathroom. It is ever revolving and I hate throwing them out so some lipsticks may be a year or two old. I also have to say that every few months or so I have a ‘giveaway’ to my girlfriends and mom where they can choose any lipstick they want from my collection.
So, as you can see, my favorites are up front (down at the bottom);  I have multiple colors  and formulations from YSL, Chanel, Bobbi Brown, and Dior.

Here is a list of my favorite colors:

Bobbi Brown– Great colors, long lasting, moisturizing: Raisin, Burnt Red, and sometimes Papaya

Chanel– Not as moisturizing for me as Bobbi, but great variety of reds: Fatale-red

Dior– Not as long lasting, but moisturizing and feels great on lips: 773 Rouge Podium (a great orangey-pinky-red), 714 Brun (shimmery brown pink), 811 Red (no longer available), Also love Dior Addict Lip Glow which is like a lip balm but brings out the natural pink in your lips.

YSL I love the golden glosses! They add a lot of color for a gloss, are moisturizing, have actual gold flecks, and look AMAZING! #2 is my favorite!!

Here is a list of some of my other ‘must haves’:

Cetaphil cleanser and moisturizer

Smashbox Oil Free primer

Armani Luminous Silk foundation or Bare Minerals Matte Powder

Chanel waterproof eyeliner

Benefit They’re Real mascara, Dior New Look Mascara or L’oreal Voluminous Million Lashes Mascara

Last but not least, my favorite lip balms:

Carmex (in stick form), Eos sweet mint, and Aqauphor (which by the way is great for things such as dry elbows, knees, around the eyes, etc…anything dry, this is a great moisturizer)

Have a great day! Today, I let you pick the lipstick color…what are your faves? I’d love to know!

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Pet Peeves

17 Jan

This weeks blog topic in my blogging group GBE2 is pet peeves. Initially I didn’t want to take part this week because I thought I was easy going and really didn’t have many pet peeves. As the week has progressed, while pondering this topic and thinking about what my pet peeves may be, I realized that after cancer I actually have more things that bother me than I thought…uh oh. Anyhow, I thought I’d list some of them out.

1 I can’t stand when people not only think they are better than you, but act like they’re better than you.

2 I don’t like it when people make assumptions about you based on hearsay, looks, gender, race, etc, without really knowing you or your story

3 I don’t like having to repeat myself to my kids when they’re asked to do something (especially when I know they hear me)

4 I don’t like it when I’m asked to take care of something that that person could do…”these leftovers are going to rot in the fridge, you should really throw them out”…My reply, “’You’re looking at it, can’t you throw it out?”

5 I don’t like it when people are nice to your face but will talk negatively about you if given the chance (really dislike disingenuous people)

6 I’m bothered by consistent complaining about dumb things…life is too short. Either someone is worst off or generally it’s not that bad

7 Last thing for now, I cant stand it when I purchase something and I get home, open the box and it’s the wrong item, the wrong size, the wrong color (referring to lipstick of course)

I’m sure there are many more, but it’s a small snapshot of what I thought about with pet peeves as my topic in mind this week. Obviously most of my pet peeves are related to people and their treatment or mistreatment. Once again, love God , love others. Look people in the eyes, find out their stories. Don’t be too quick to judge. Also, gossip is the quickest way to dissolve a trusting relationship, be careful, it could be poison. All it takes is one person to start a fire.

This week I choose Smashbox Be Legendary lipstick in Legendary. First off, it’s red, second, who doesn’t want their life to be legendary? As a side note, this is a new Smashbox formulation which is more creamy and the colors are beautiful! Enjoy!

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Why Stop?

11 Dec

I’ve been feeling kinda funky lately. A few weeks ago I had breakfast with my vocal coach Marie.  I hadn’t seen her in at least a year, in fact the last time we saw each other was 2 months after my last radiation treatment.  Sure, we kept up with email and Facebook, but this was our first face to face.  It was emotional because she was an integral part of recovering my singing voice after my first couple of surgeries. We were able to catch up on life and everything which had transpired. At the end of our meeting she asked when I would start voice lessons again.  Later the same week I had an appointment with my speech pathologist, again someone integral to my voice recovery. Dr Menaldi has always been there after each surgery helping me not only regain control of my breathing, but also strengthening the voice I was left with. At this particular appointment I told her I had seen Marie and she was excited that I would try to sing again. I told her I wasn’t sure that’s what I wanted and she said, “Of course that’s what you want, doesn’t singing still bring you joy?” Fast forward a few days later when I ran into a former music director. He asked how I was feeling and asked if I could still sing, I replied that I may be able to but am not sure I want to.  He asked the same thing, “Does it still bring you joy?” Most of you know that singing and music has always been a lifelong passion for me, it has always come easy and I have been fortunate to be able to sing at differnet venues throughout my life. When my nerve was cut during the first surgery leaving my vocal cord paralyzed, I grieved the singing, but it came back.  Cancer came back a second time and I grieved that part of me again, but my singing voice fought back. Cancer attacked yet a third time and it took a little more; not only the trauma from the surgeries, but also the massive doses of radiation have wreaked havoc on my voice and breathing. My voice has not been the same and yes I can still sing, but it requires so much thought, control and effort.  When I was told that there were cancer cells yet again last June, I gave up on the singing.  I was tired of grieving over my voice and trying to hang on to it, that I let it go. With these questions the past couple of weeks singing has been brought back to my mind…does it still bring me joy? Do I still want to try?

Tonight I went to my dad’s Christmas choir concert and watching him sing almost brought me to tears. I saw the excitement of the people singing together and just hearing the live music and watching the joy on my dad’s face just being a part, well, it was overwhelming. My dad is 70+ years old and here he was, still doing something he loved and was passionate about. I love music and I love to sing. I miss it and yes, it does bring me joy. I believe God gives us gifts and talents and passions and He gave me my music. I am tired of grieving over what I still currently have. Do we all do that? Give up before trying? Grieve over something or someone before it’s even gone? Is it fear of the unknown?

What are you passionate about? What lies in your heart that you are curious about and have not taken that step toward? What is holding you back?  My lesson was this again…life is short, too short to grieve what I still have. I miraculously still have my voice and my voice teacher and speech pathologist (along with my laryngologist, Dr Rubin) all tell me that there is nothing that can stop me from singing, so why did I stop trying? Despite a parlayzed vocal cord and some damage from radiation to the other, I can still sing and it’s a miracle. The only thing that was stopping me was me. Press on in your journey, don’t let yourself be the stumbling block.

Today I wear Smashbox True Color lipgloss in Fame. It is a beautiful rosy plum sheen with a lot of moisture (great for this time of year). I chose it not only for the color, but for the name. ‘Fame’ of course was one of the many shows I watched when I was younger that fed my love of music and the arts!

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The Story Continues…

4 Jul

Some of you already know the results of my latest PET scan (my last blog entry), for those who don’t, yes, there was cancer detected.  I found out last Friday afternoon and for the past few days I’ve been trying to process how I feel.  I cried a lot mainly because my mind wanted to hear the words “All clear, see you next year.”  Instead I heard, “There’s something there that’s not big enough to be detected by ultrasound so we will look again in 2-3 months to see if it’s grown.”  This has been one long and difficult road but I think I’m done crying.  I’m not angry, my heart is mostly sad; sad for my family (which by the way, my daughter and younger son were standing right next to me when I got the news and when I got off the phone my daughter said, “all clean right?”  When I said “not exactly”, her face and demeanor changed immediately…sad); sad for my parents who also have been waiting for good news for almost four years now, just sad in general.

On the other hand, I am done crying because I am 100% confident that God has a plan that’s perfect for my family and me whether it’s the plan I want or not.  I have to move forward in faith because that is the only sure thing.  I am broken right now.  I don’t feel courageous or strong so I’m thankful for all the support and prayers, but I know I’ll get that back.  For now, I move forward on this journey that God has me on, confident that He will take care of me.

Today I wear Smashbox Photofinish  Lipstick in Marvelous. On me, it is a beautiful sheer red.  I wear it because life is a marvelous adventure, and of course red to continue living life boldly.

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